What other explanation can there possibly be for standing outside my girlfriend's apartment while she and her EX are both inside, doing God only Knows what?
How else can I explain the overriding impulse to slink guiltily away, before somebody notices me lurking like peeping Tom in the Pre-dawn shadows?
This is really painful and sickening. Sometimes even with my not too complex mind, I wish we shared 99% of our DNA with ostriches rather than chimps. It would make us more prone to bury our heads when faced with such unpalatable situations. *I know this because I saw ostriches almost everyday during high school, so I know their ways. NVM tho' .
I think this whole debacle would hurt a little less if it weren't her 20th bday and despite my meticulous plans, so that I'd be the first person she sees today is now as deflated as my ego. The worst thing of all, I'm standing here like a prize moron with a dozen roses in one hand and in one hand gifts like hand-made biscuits, chocolates.......
I've been planning to surprise her for weeks. With no money on me, I had to sell some stuffs, got small loan from sola (a friend). I never knew I'd end up crying. Though this is strange but I saw it coming. She still laugh and whine around her Ex because of one flashy car, displays him on BBM. But I thought it was only that she was missing him, which is almost normal to miss memories with an oldie (EX). To the extent of asking him for financial assistance without my knowledge. Might not be as rich as the EX but I love her. At least I didn't ignore or cheat on her like he did.
Sometimes I wish I can grow boobs, considering my luck with Les Dames (the ladies). I'm almost certain that a man with his own boobs will never be bored. I don't mean 'man-boobs' or some gbengish(from gbenga) boobs though, I mean proper girly-bumps.
I understand she had good times with this Ex and she suffered heartbreak. I did exploit this just as a way to get her heart and convince her I was a better option.
I saw the light of the room and the curtain of the room twitch and Panic rises again ; should I stay and confront her or just run-away? Could I come back later and pretend I know nothing of her overnight guest?
And all of a sudden, tope her neighbour and a friend came out. It was still around 5:30am. She saw the gifts in my hands, gave me a little hug and asked if I've seen my GF but with the look on my face she knew I already have a clue of what's happening in my GF's room.
Then my GF came out of the front door after tope knocked to inform her of my arrival or presence. She bumped out with just towel tied up to her girly-bumps. She looked at me emotionlessly and folds her arms across her chest. She frankly told me "hey I'm sorry, I still love michael (the EX). He's a part of me I couldn't do without". Tried convincing her but vain was the end result. The Ex then came out with a funny smile on his face. And straight up, I jab my fist out and punch him in the mouth, he tried to punch back but I was pretty much a dodger. At that moment I feel my balls drop back into place. I was a man again because love filled me with uterus and I became soft for her. But now I have testosterone in me.
I dropped all the gifts afterwards and I left. I planned a surprise but met a surprise. Do have a 'bitchful' birthday, you Slutface.
Now I believe, there's no honesty in any relationship, girls are just bunch of sluts.
Maybe this is just hasty generalization. I have friends (girls) who are pretty awesome and are not anyway near "sluttery".
*Note that this post is not about me and all the characters are not real...... Just me creating what to reflect on.
Cheating!!!
Aditu
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